An unusual topic has been trending in Nigeria’s internet space, and it’s not a new skit or big wedding. It’s PCOS. Not because of a breakthrough or awareness campaign, but because some men are now openly saying they’d end a serious relationship if a woman has it.
The conversation began under a viral tweet asking why people walked away from marriage-intended relationships. Alongside the usual suspects like infidelity or incompatibility, came a striking new entry: “She had PCOS.” That statement alone pulled attention, because it wasn’t just about personal preference but about how easily prejudice hides under the label of “standards.”
So, What Is PCOS?
PCOS is a hormonal disorder that affects millions of women globally, including many in Nigeria. It’s characterized by irregular periods, ovarian cysts, excessive hair growth (due to elevated testosterone), acne, bloating, mood swings, and sometimes weight gain or hair loss. It can also impact fertility, but here’s the part people often skip: it doesn’t make pregnancy impossible.
Plenty of women with PCOS conceive naturally. Others need medical assistance, just like many couples do regardless of medical history. It’s not a one-size-fits-all condition, and most importantly; it’s not a death sentence for motherhood.
Take Maraji, for example. The popular Nigerian skit maker has PCOS and is currently pregnant with her third child. Her story isn’t rare; it’s just rarely amplified.
Preferences vs. Prejudice
Everyone has the right to choose who they want to be with. If children are non-negotiable for someone, that’s valid. However, it becomes a problem when a lack of understanding turns a medical condition into a social stain.
Saying “I don’t want to date someone with PCOS because they can’t have kids” is like saying “I don’t want to date someone with asthma because they’ll probably die young.” It’s rooted in fear, not fact.
The most common defense thrown around in this conversation is that women also walk away from men with health conditions; so what’s the big deal? Isn’t it just equal standards? Well, not quite.
The Double Standard Nobody Mentions
Men are rarely stigmatized for their health the way women are. A man with diabetes or hypertension is seen as someone to support. A woman with PCOS? She’s immediately labeled a fertility risk, a mood swing away from drama, or a hormonal mess.
Where women are expected to be understanding, nurturing, and ride-or-die through illness, men are often praised for having “standards” when they opt out of relationships with women who face health challenges. That’s not equality, that’s a double standard dressed in selective logic, which is not just unfair but unkind.
The Real Issue: Health Illiteracy
The root of this isn’t evil intentions, it’s ignorance. Many people genuinely don’t understand what PCOS is, how it works, or how manageable it can be with the right support. But instead of asking questions or doing a quick Google search, they make permanent judgments based on limited knowledge.
This moment reveals how badly we need health literacy, especially among men. We can’t build relationships on vibes and vibes alone. If we’re going to talk about marriage, family, and long-term commitment, then understanding your partner’s health (and not judging them for it) should be the bare minimum.
A major issue that needs urgent attention is medical misogyny; an entrenched problem that has plagued our society for centuries. It is a key reason why women’s health concerns are often overlooked, with limited information and minimal public awareness surrounding these issues. If women’s health were taken as seriously as men’s, perhaps PCOS wouldn’t be viewed by some as a dealbreaker in long-term relationships.
What This Says About Us
PCOS is already a tough condition to live with. It’s invasive, it’s exhausting, and it often comes with emotional and physical tolls that most people will never see. To then face romantic rejection not because of who you are, but because of how your body responds to hormones? That’s an added burden nobody deserves.
We need to stop framing medical conditions as red flags. A red flag is manipulation, dishonesty, or cruelty. PCOS is not a personality trait or a choice. It’s a health issue, one that’s manageable, treatable, and absolutely not a reason to discard someone who could be a perfectly loving, committed partner.
In the end, this isn’t just about PCOS. It’s about how we talk about women, health, and worth. And right now, we’re failing that conversation. That’s why we at Inside Success Nigeria are committed to raising awareness about women’s health to empower women, helping them understand that their conditions don’t define their worth, and also to abolish the ignorance creepling our society.
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