If you’ve been on Twitter recently, you’ve probably stumbled upon the raging conversation about the “boy child being left behind.” According to the loudest voices in this debate, who are mostly men, it seems the world is now obsessed with women and girls, while poor boys are being thrown to the wolves.
The argument goes: everything is about women’s empowerment. Opportunities? For girls. Scholarships? For girls. Leadership programs? You guessed it. Girls. Meanwhile, the boy child is supposedly left to wander the streets aimlessly, armed only with a dead phone and a dream.
Now, here’s where it gets wild. Some of these same men claim that single mothers are “ruining young boys’ lives.” Pause. So women are blamed for focusing on helping girls and blamed for boys not turning out right? Make it make sense.
How History Shaped Today’s Gender Gap
Let’s zoom out a bit.
Not too long ago, the education system (and most other systems) deliberately kept girls and women out. Girls had to fight tooth and nail just for the right to sit in a classroom. Literally. Some women had to dodge insults, jail time, even violence, just to hold a book or walk into a university.
Fast forward to today: women are working overtime, building support networks, pushing for opportunities, and mentoring the next generation of girls. As a result, girls are catching up, thriving, and running laps around the boys in some areas.
Culture, Patriarchy, and the Boy Child Dilemma
Meanwhile, what’s happening with the boys?
Many of them are growing up being told “boys will be boys”. Translation? You can do whatever you like with minimal accountability.
Girls are micromanaged from the jump: “Sit properly.” “Come home early.” “Don’t talk to boys.” Girls are conditioned to take life seriously. Boys? Not so much.
But when the girls start stacking degrees and building careers, suddenly the conversation turns to: “But what about the boy child?”
The Rise of Toxic “Mentorship”
Here’s the real tea: The girls have mentors. The boys have… podcasts.
Instead of building young men up, too many of today’s “mentors” are handing microphones to Andrew Tate wannabes. Men whose main goal is to bash women and teach boys that disrespecting women is the ultimate flex. It’s not leadership. It’s not growth. It’s just sad.
Case in point: it was recently discovered that some boys, under the influence of Tate’s content, have stopped listening to their female teachers. Imagine failing math because your YouTube hero said women can’t teach you anything. Yikes.
Patriarchy and cultural norms in many African societies also play a major role. Boys are raised to believe they are naturally superior, entitled to leadership, and exempt from showing vulnerability. Cultural expectations often discourage boys from expressing emotions or asking for help. Being able to ask for help is important for personal growth and success today. The very system that historically privileged boys is now failing to equip them for a changing world that demands more than bravado; it demands empathy, skills, and emotional intelligence.
How We Actually Save the Boy Child
So, who’s really failing the boy child?
Here’s the solution:
If men are truly concerned about the boy child, they need to step up. This cannot be done with empty tweets.
- Mentor, don’t mislead. Older men should intentionally mentor young boys on leadership, emotional intelligence, respect, and hard work. Not just “how to get rich” or “how to dominate women.”
- Celebrate learning. Teach boys that education and growth aren’t “feminine”. They’re powerful tools for anyone who wants to win at life.
- Model good behavior. Boys need to see men treating women (and everyone else) with respect, taking responsibility for their actions, and constantly learning.
- Create healthy communities. Start clubs, mentorship programs, and workshops where young boys can build real skills, confidence, and character. Less keyboard warriors, more actual warriors for good.
Finally, we need to face the truth that empowering girls doesn’t disempower boys. It just means we’re finally playing on a level field. Boys aren’t “left behind” because girls are succeeding. They’re left behind when society feeds them lies instead of leadership.
Let’s save the boy child. Not by complaining and blaming women, but by actually showing up for them.
If we can limit the podcasts about “high-value men” and focus on more podcasts about being a decent human being, we might just save a generation.
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